IN THE END, IT'S UP TO YOU

 

One day I woke up, for the first time in my life, missing massively such adolescence that I didn't have, maybe this is the reason. The past hurts a lot, even though it's good and bad too. It’s bad because it makes us suffer, sometimes we even remember the pain that it caused on us, every betrayal, every beating, every injustice; and the good, for the dreams we had, for the flirtations and festive looks, as we desired to arrive the Monday to flirt with our high school sweetheart.

I didn't have a high school boyfriend, I always liked to read, I was always the book worm, but I had my friends who told me and still said I was happy because I didn't have a boyfriend. She barely knew that I used to read books to dream about. I listened to David Bowie’s "Sorrow", listened to the tracks of international soap operas such as "Rock'n Roll Lullaby" and felt like the ugliest woman in the world because no one looked at me, so every night I took my little blue radio and listened to Radio Tamoio or Mundial, so I traveled the world! Then, when I returned to reality, I had no little blue radio, no longer I had a dream and all the singers I liked got physically dead because for me, they are still alive inside my heart. It is inevitable that the tears fall, so live the today as if it were the last day of your life, do everything you want, do not let anyone boss in your life, no one says what you should do, because you know who will suffer if you do not listen to the advice I am giving you from my own experience: it will be you who will be a bitter and sad woman.

The worst thing there is is regreting, so do, have an overdose of pleasure while you can! As you remember your good past, just smile and thank God for being happy! It's still because you have good memories and you haven't become a spiteful woman with yourself for not doing what you wanted, for obeying others to the detriment of yourself.

Good luck!! Oh, do not think, therefore, thinking gives wrinkle and takes away your courage, go with your mind, body and soul!

Written by Katia Paes on 01/29/2021.